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Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Raising a Racist???

Today's post was going to be a bucket list. This mornings trip to preschool drastically altered the way this post is going to go.

I walk my son inside. I sign him in. I let him into his room and blow him a kiss. Sounds like a perfect morning right? Should have been. But directly behind me is the teacher. She wants to talk. (Can you feel my excitement right now?) Any preschool conversation that starts with 'I didn't want to talk about this in front of him' has the potential to ruin my morning.

Before I tell you the statement my son made to another kid, let me provide you with information. I bought my son new shoes. Teenage mutant ninja turtle shoes that light up. My son does not like to share under the best of conditions. New shoes are completely off limits unless you are helping him put them on.

Another child says 'Your shoes are so cool!' and touches them. Six months ago, my son would have hit this other child. So I guess I should be happy I wasn't having a discussion about putting other kids in danger. This conversation is one I'm not sure how to handle. I never thought I would have to handle it.

I never thought I would hear of my son saying "Don't touch my shoes! I don't want them to turn black!" to an African American kid. NEVER THOUGHT! For the love of God, my best friend and brother (obviously not blood related) is black. He's been exposed. Skin color differences are not new to him.

I call Daddy, who giggles at the story. I warn Daddy no giggling tonight when we address the subject with our son. His answer- I'll try.

I have tried on many occasions to tell Daddy that my day isn't all about talking my son to school then hanging out while the little one naps. I actually have to handle things. Apparently now I have to handle racism. We have been working on social skills for so long, that I think we missed a giant obvious thing we should have been talking about. What it is and is not appropriate to say to other people.

So today we are going to talk about:
1- You can not tell people they are fat
2- You can not tell people they smell funny
3- You can not tell people they are ugly
4- You can not tell people you don't like them (or they can't touch things) because of their skin color
5- You can not tell people they are mean
6- You can not tell people they are stupid
And the list goes on.....


Basically, if any of you are Big Bang Theory fans out there, I feel as if I am raising a Sheldon. He's a smart kid. He's far beyond where he should be intellectually. However, he has no concept of tact. I grew up with a very small filter between my brain and my mouth. My mother got her wish. I got one just like me, only worse. He has NO filter. Everything is literal and he says just what he thinks.

Today, that made him a racist. And that made me the mom of a racist. And that we need to fix.

And who says being a stay at home mom is easy?????